Patch Adams M.D. Book vs. Movie Review

Patch Adams is a hippie doctor that believes in communal living and happiness as a way to wellness. The movie was supposed to help with Patch’s dream of a free hospital coming true. It did not raise any money. In my opinion, the ending of the movie killed the entrepreneurial aspect of the movie. The message came out completely wrong.

The message at the end of the movie is “don’t trust strangers” as Patch’s girlfriend gets murdered by a man she is trying to help. The message of Patch’s life is the opposite. In real life, Patch married his girlfriend. They had a baby and lived 26 years of mutual respect and happiness until a respectful divorce. Both are still alive and Patch never questioned his mission to live communally and help everyone.

This book is a biography of Patch’s life; he really did contemplate suicide and wear funny costumes. It is also a manual to healthy living and his vision for a free full scale hospital and commune. While Patch may seem like a flaky idealist, he lives life in an extraordinary way. He started “clown visits” to Russia. He rides a unicycle during medical assessments. He loves people and life with no regrets and no limits.

He doesn’t believe in mainstream health care. He doesn’t believe in malpractice insurance, 3rd party reimbursement, or power of provider over patient. He believes that laughter is just as, if not more, important than medicine. He believes in being friends with his patients. Even though his hospital hasn’t reached his full vision, his vision has grown to a global outreach of bringing laughter and loving care to communities around the world.

Check out his website here: https://www.patchadams.org/ to learn more and even contribute to one of his many causes and outreach programs that continue to this day.

The Search for the Green River Killer: The True Story of America’s most notorious serial killer case ever by Carlton Smith and Tomas Guillen

This isn’t the type of book I usually read but it was good to expand my horizons into new territory: true crime. My neighbor knew I like to read and that I really like nonfiction; she brought the book to me. I took it as an assignment with just a bit of intrigue. The intrigue grew with every page. I chewed through half the book the first weekend it was in my hands and read a couple chapters after work during the week.

This book goes into fascinating detail of the investigative work that
occurred during the entire ordeal. I believe it went into such detail because as of first print, it was still an unsolved mystery. Only in the added material in the end do we find out who dun it. 

I had no idea so much politics were involved in these types of investigations. It’s all about funding and that comes from the hands of the politicians. The media and public opinion also played a major role in the investigation. Media drove public opinion. Public opinion swayed political decisions- to keep the votes mainly! Isn’t that politics?

It ultimately took 20 years and only one of the multitude of investigators was still working on the case when the killer was convicted. One of the investigators had to retire for mental health reasons due to the extraneous matters in this case. Another died from a freak scuba diving accident. This true psychopath murdered 48 females, mostly young prostitutes (who were respectfully portrayed in the book). The killer saw the corpses as his property after he killed them. The book includes graphic depictions related to the murders so reader beware: rape, necrophilia, etc… Despite, passing a lie detector test, science eventually caught up with the killer through DNA samples. 

If you like true crime and can stomach real gore- check out this book. 

 

Promises: Guest Poetry by Shaundi M.

Image by Myriams-Fotos from Pixabay

Spent my days wandering. 

Listening to the promises of the world.

Failing to see, failing to hear, failing by a hardened heart. 

Lies dealt and laid out like the broken shards of my life. 

Filled with desolation, lost in the wilderness of life…darkness creeps in and I’m left drowning in the broken promises and lies of this life. 

I know You are with me. Even in the darkest hours of the night, I know Your promises will crush the darkness and bring forth the light. Have mercy on me, Lord-break me free of this desolation. 

Filled with pain, anger, frustration…lost in the darkness of sin, and I’m left drowning in the broken promises and lies of this life. 

God, I cry out to You. Your love and unending mercy-I cry out to You. I can’t live in this world without You. God please hear my cries, wipe away the pain, brush the tears aside. Bless me with Your grace, bless me with strength to love and live within You and for You…

A Poem

Emotions happen.
Feel them. Ride Them.
And Bounce Back.
The ride will repeat>
Curves will sharpen, twist, and change.
But There is Bounce Back.
There are others
Crying in closets.
There are others
screaming in pillows and hitting air.
You are NOT alone
NOT today or on that special holiday.
Nor am I.
Ugly Cries and Pretty Faces.
Wine, Chocolate, and Friends.

Why, Where, and How to Volunteer

Volunteering is good for mental health. Here’s a quick why, where, and how of volunteering:

Why: A sense of purpose. Seeing that you are needed and can be helpful. Giving is better than getting. Fulfillment. Pride in helping. Meaningful activity. Because you need something to do. Being around people. Build relationships and comradery. Because you are in a bad mood and need uplifting or because you are in a good mood and want to share it. Physically good for you. Challenge yourself to learn and do new things. Increase self-confidence, knowledge, and experience. Decrease depression and anxiety. Family bonding time. Because it’s fun. These are all good reasons; there’s no wrong reason to volunteer! You are needed in whatever volunteer activity you choose to do.

Where: Soup kitchens, fun runs/walks, sponsor a child, foster a child or animal, donate to a food pantry, donate blood, babysit, make cards for people, give with your artistic/creative talents, mow someone’s lawn, pay for the person in behind you in the fast food line, greet or teach Sunday school at church, join a community or work committee, help at a local hospital. Mentor a youth. Clean up trash. Help a single mom clean or work around her house or yard. Adopt a shelter pet. Help at local pet shelter. Work in a community garden. There are so many places and ways to volunteer.

How: Do an internet search of any of the above or ask around- church, work, friends, family, or even ask the librarian. Pick something that interests you and you will enjoy. Don’t over extend yourself- just do what fits and works for your schedule and capabilities.

What do you do for volunteering? What would you be interested in doing?

Thoughts on “My Life is a Book” by Christina B.

First, I just have to say that I’m super stoked to have this collaboration with a fellow writer. This is the first book review for book exchange that I’m typing out. I have another book on it’s way to me in the mail for review. I reached out to both authors and just asked, “Hey, can I have your book in exchange for a review?” and they said “Yes.”! This is so fun for me as an avid reader. So, thank you Christiana B. for being open to this collaboration and thank you to WordPress for making these connections happen.

In “My Life is a Book”, Christina B. talks to us like a friend. She tells us personal stories and gives life advice. Christina begins the book by saying why she is writing it and who it is for and may not be for. She states: “You will not find tips on how to become rich and famous. Instead, you will find tips on how to accept yourself, love yourself, nourish your soul and put some boundaries in your life.” Christina talks about how a medium helped to encourage her to write this book. As a Christian and a former medium myself, I do not personally condone going to a medium. I believe there are demonic sources behind mediums’ psychic powers. The author’s belief system also includes numerology, reincarnation, karma, guardian angels, and spiritual awakening. I continued to read this book because I know that’s not what this book is all about. There are enough gold nuggets sprinkled throughout the book to still make reading worthwhile even if my worldview is different.

Some golden nuggets from the book:

don’t live for society, live for yourself.

you might be surprised by what you can learn if you just allow yourself to accept others.

Life has shown me that the evil we have experienced does not define us and that we have the power and the right to want to change our destiny.

You are seen, you are needed and you can do everything that you want to and more.

Chapter 2 touches on how we were raised vs. what we choose to do with that. We don’t have to repeat bad behaviors but we can learn from them; we can improve and change. Chapter 2 also includes experiences and words of healing from domestic violence and postpartum depression. Chapter 3 covers friendships and breaking up with toxicity. Chapter 4 is primarily a real, raw, and poignant letter to Childhood. Chapter 5, Dear Sad People, is a nonjudgmental letter that made me smile and feel like I was just given a soft warm hug. It made me feel respected and given space to feel and breathe- like a good therapy session. I related to Christina a lot in this chapter. It’s a good read for anyone that has dealt with, is dealing with, or knows someone dealing with depression. Chapter 6 is a great chapter for people in dating mode; the author shares her knowledge, experience, and perspectives on love. However, this love she speaks of goes far beyond dating relationships. Chapter 7 is the chapter I most looked forward to reading. It turned out to be both about mental health particularly related to work. I’m so proud of you, Christina! And you will be proud and inspired too after you read through this chapter (and book). Chapter 8 talks about negative/positive thinking, materialistic/nonmaterialistic, and gratitude.

Christina’s Self-care List: read, color, hot bath/shower, yoga/meditation, write, & massage.

Christina even added wonderful drawings for you to color in her book!

I feel privileged to have got to have an insider’s view in the thoughts of the author. The book left me motivated, inspired, and thoughtful; all perfect feelings after the reading of a good book.

Read the book by ordering here.

Check out the author’s blog here.

Is “Where the Crawdads Sing” by Delia Owens good entertainment for Christians?

If you want my quick and easy answer: it’s a solid no. This is a popular book. It’s become a hit movie. But, I do not recommend this book for young people and I warn adults to proceed with caution. “Where the Crawdads Sing” is a coming of age, romance, murder mystery with courtroom drama. The book is whimsical, detailed, interesting, intriguing, artistic, and captivating. It is absolutely beautifully well written in a perfect package from beginning to end. I love the descriptions, the intertwined poetry, parallel timelines, and foreshadowing. But is this something you would read with Jesus in a book club, if He did that type of thing. Nope.

Sexual Content– My first “what have I got myself into” moment reading this book when I got into reading the sexual desires and experiences. There is a moment where the main character, Kya, has a sexual experience with the water. There is explicit pre-marital foreplay and sex, sexual assault, loss of virginity, attempted rape, and ultimately a disregard for marriage itself.

Christian Representation– One Christian character, Mabel, shows compassion to Kya but another, the preacher’s wife, shows extreme prejudice against “the dirty Marsh girl”.

Worldview– While Kya has a Bible, she worships nature. The Bible is only used as a way for her to know her siblings names and birthdays.

Rating– The movie is rated PG-13. The book should be rated R. I am leery of the PG-13 rating because I believe that young people will watch the movie and want to read the book.

Language– While it references animals, the f-word is used multiple times. The B–ch and S-word are used. There is crude language toward African American characters as well.

POTENTIAL SPOILER ALERT– My analysis of the entire book is that the murder was justified. We come to love Kya through the book but because of who she is, what she has been through, and what she learned in nature vs. the nurturing that she never received- it is assumed that she deserved the good life that she was able to achieve.

This book is good in a worldly sense but, as Christians, we are to discern the worldly from the Godly and strive for Godliness in our lives, thoughts, and entertainment.

Toxic Positivity

Disclaimer: This is a guest post. I have not created this post nor do I own it. I do follow, enjoy, and gain insight from the author’s blog. Link provided at end of article.

Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay

On yesterdays post titled “Anxiety”, I mentioned how I’ve been feeling a little low and I talked about wanting to share it with you guys. I tried to explain what I meant but it was the middle of the night and I had just woken up and added that part so I was unable to share my thoughts properly. Special shoutout to the cats fighting in the background and distracting me.

So, I thought I would share my thoughts today and be a little more articulate about it. As I mentioned, I didn’t want to share that information for sympathy or anything like that. The reason I wanted to share that information is because of “toxic positivity.”

If you are unfamiliar with what toxic positivity is, please click here for more information on it. I don’t want to go too much into it because that’s not why I’m writing this post. No, I’m writing this post because once again it’s time to put the whine in lifesfinewhine.

What toxic positivity does is encourage people to repress their negative feelings and act like things are perfect when they are not.

As someone who does social media management I spend a lot of time on social media on behalf of my clients and I see a lot of stuff on there. And one thing I’ve noticed about social media is that there is really an abundance of toxic positivity on there and it drives me a little crazy (well crazier than I already am- shoutout to my anxiety and depression).

I think people really want their life to seem perfect on there and it encourages this notion that it is possible to have a perfect life. Except, it’s not. No ones life is perfect and everyone has their problems. What toxic positivity does is encourage people to repress their negative feelings and act like things are perfect when they are not. It also makes people associate negative feelings with shame or guilt because they feel like they shouldn’t be experiencing them. Lastly, it makes them less empathetic to other peoples negative feelings and these are often the kind of people that tell others to just “be happy and not worry about stuff.”

Basically, toxic positivity has truly opened up a whole can of worms and not the delicious gummy kind. It has not only led a lot of people that suffer from mental illnesses astray but has also perpetuated the notion that mental health issues can simply go away by being positive when in reality it takes a lot more work than that and for some it may take professional help and medication.

I experience negative emotions and that’s okay.

Negative emotions exist for a reason and we experience them for a reason. It’s unhealthy to live in some kind of delusion where everything is okay all the time. Negative emotions can be painful and difficult to process which is why so many of us shy away from them but in reality all we are doing is repressing them. We push them into a little jar and close the lid tightly but what happens when the jar gets full and overflows? Rather than having to deal with that it’s so much easier to learn to process negative emotions. Experience them, process them and learn to move on from them in your own way.

The reason I wrote about experiencing negative emotions was because I wanted to be real and not act like I have some kind of perfect life because I don’t. Just like everyone other person on this planet. I have my issues and problems. I experience negative emotions and that’s okay. And I want everyone reading this blog to know that. Don’t be fooled by the people online or in your life that act like everything is perfect because I guarantee you they have issues and problems too.

This is a weird place to end the post but your girl needs to work now. Thanks to everyone who left a comment on that post- I read each one including the ones WP decided to wrongfully put in my spam. This is honestly just the best community to be a part of. And remember- it’s okay to feel like crap sometimes. It’s okay tasty in bed and not be productive sometimes. It’s okay to smack your neighbor because they’re making noise while you’re trying to write a post not be okay sometimes. Nothing last forever and nobody’s perfect.

I hope this post made sense- it was a little too ramble-y but some of you really enjoy that so I don’t know?? I tried to keep the words to a minimum too but it seems I’ve already reached almost a thousand and me rambling on about how much I rambled on this post probably isn’t helping. I mean it’s helping with my SEO but not great for readers. And here I am rambling again so I’m just going to go now.

If you are experiencing negative emotions and don’t know how to deal with them or find them too overwhelming please do seek professional help especially if the emotions don’t go away over time.

If you enjoyed this guest post, please check out the authors blog at Lifesfinewhine.

5 Reasons to Travel Solo

kayaking Blue Heart Springs solo
  1. Empowerment– To step out of your comfort zone, make all the decisions, and go into the unknown alone and reliant only on yourself boosts self confidence in a way that nothing else can.
  2. Peace– I love people, but I also know that I require a certain amount of solitude. Solitude at home doing chores isn’t what I mean. There is definitely a peace that comes from not engaging in conversation or day-to-day interactions for a while.
  3. Your way– I’ve heard so many people say they wish they would’ve seen or done this and that on vacation but the person or people they were with didn’t want to. Going solo gives you full reigns on your schedule with no regrets.
  4. New Friends– While you have an option to stay to yourself, you also have the opportunity to meet new people. This may lead to long lasting friendships or one casual conversation that you would not have otherwise had if you were with others.
  5. Save Money– On my recent solo trip I was able to save a lot of money by staying at spare rooms in Airbnbs. This would not have been an option if I was with another person or a group. I also bought myself some groceries and didn’t have to eat out if I didn’t want to. I could spend as little or as much as I wanted to without having to spend money doing things that I wasn’t very excited about.

I recommend everyone traveling solo at least once in their lifetime!

How far from home have you traveled alone? How did it go for you?

5 Reasons Why You Need Vacation

Bruneau Sand Dunes, Idaho

Growing up, going to Wal-Mart was our excitement. My family never took vacations and my parents rarely travel. But, there is a reason why vacation time is a thing. People NEED to and SHOULD go on a getaway at least once or twice a year. Here are 5 benefits to going on vacation:

  1. Reboot your mind– Exposure to new images, sensations, and ideas have a positive impact on the way you think and what you think about. This can improve mental health, work performance, and home life.
  2. Reduce Stress– Vacation can be a beneficial temporary distraction from the daily grind. No matter what you do, at work or at home, you can hit burnout if you go too long without a real break.
  3. Enhance Relationships– A vacation can mean bonding time together. A vacation can also bring color to relationships that aren’t on the trip with you by giving you more to add to conversations and a positive mood to share with others.
  4. Improve Your Health– Stress is bad for your overall wellbeing; a vacation can reduce stress levels. Often vacations include increased physical activity like walking, hiking, or other adventures. Decrease stress. Increase physical activity. It’s a win-win!
  5. Broaden Your Knowledge– There is so much to learn out there from new roads, different cultures, or local histories. You may learn about and experience new foods and flavors. You may make new friends and learn about them and their perspectives. The world is full of interesting and exciting things!

BONUS: You deserve it! Life is full of difficult challenges. The world can be a hard place to live and cope with personal and global struggles. Everyone deserves a good vacation. Where do you want to go?